TNS-03505: Failed to resolve name

Windows OS

set TNS_ADMIN=%ORACLE_HOME%\network\admin

Dos command prompt to test

Set TNS_ADMIN environment variable for SYSTEM and USER

Dos command prompt to test

Everyone Has Something Special

Everyone Has Something Special
人皆有天赋 信则梦成真

Ｆｒｏｍ ａｇｉｆｔｏｆｉｎｓｐｉｒａｔｉｏｎ．ｃｏｍ．ａｕ 半文盐 译

并不是人人都拥有很高的智商，但每个人肯定都有自己的天赋，都有自己最擅长的领域。相信自己，挖掘自己的天赋，你的未来不是梦。

加拿大小男孩约翰尼·马丁是一个木匠的儿子。他的父母节衣缩食，为他以后上大学攒学费。就在约翰尼上高中二年级那年，一个沉重的打击袭来。学校的心理医生把刚满16岁的约翰尼叫到了他的办公室，对约翰尼说了下面这段话：

“约翰尼，我一直在研究你的学习成绩和你的体检情况。我已经对你和你的成绩做了十分仔细的研究。但很抱歉，我必须告诉你……”“我一直都在努力。”约翰尼插话说。

“问题就在这里，”心理医生说，“你的确已经非常努力了，可一点效果也没有。你的学习好像就是无法再取得任何进步。你天生不是这块料，如果你继 续上中学，依我看，也只是浪费时间。”约翰尼用双手捂住了脸。“这会让妈妈、爸爸非常难过的，”他说，“他们唯一的希望就是让我上大学。”

心理医生把手放在男孩的肩膀上，说：“约翰尼，人都有不同的天赋。然而，我们每个人都有自己独特的才能——你也不例外。总有一天，你会发现自己独特的天赋，到那时，你会让父母为你感到十分骄傲的。”

约翰尼再也没有回学校。镇上工作很难找，但他还是设法找到些给人修剪草坪、摆弄花坛的活计。这时，一件奇怪的事情发生了。他的顾客很快发现，约 翰尼其实是一个园艺高手。由他侍弄的植物生长开花了，玫瑰也繁花似锦。他渐渐习惯了建议别人重新布置前院的景观。他对色彩很有鉴赏力，颜色搭配常常出人意 料，让人看了赏心悦目。

一天，他去城里的时候，偶然在市政厅的后面发现了一块闲置的空地。或许是机缘巧合，或许是命中注定，无论怎么说，此时正有一位市政委员走过市政厅的拐角。男孩一阵冲动，对他说：“如果您允许的话，我可以把这片垃圾场变成一个花园。”

“市里可没有钱来搞什么美化。”市政委员说。“我一分钱都不要，”男孩说，“我只是想试试。”竟然有人干活不要钱，这让市政委员感到很惊讶。他 把约翰尼领进了一间办公室，当这个年轻人出来的时候，已经得到授权来清除这块公认的“眼中钉”。没多久，那块沉闷乏味的老垃圾场就变成了一个小小的花园。 镇上所有的人都在谈论，这个年轻人把这块地方变得多么可爱。

这已是25年前的事情了。现在的约翰尼是一家生意兴隆的园艺设计公司的负责人。他的客户已经扩展到临近的其他省份。他年迈的父母为他感到骄傲，不仅仅因为他是一位成功人士，还因为他把自己的那部分世界变得更为美好，适宜居住。

Johnnie Martin is a young Canadian boy. He was the son of a carpenter. His parents lived frugal lives, saving their money for the day when they could send their son to college. Johnnie had reached the second year in high school when the blow fell. A psychologist of the school called the young man, just reached sixteen, into his office and this is what he said.

“Johnnie, I’ve been studying your marks and I’ve gone over your physical examinations. I’ve made a very careful study of you and your achievements. And I feel sorry to have to tell you…” “I’ve been trying hard,” put in Johnnie.

“That’s just the trouble,” said the psychologist. “You have worked very hard indeed, but it has not helped. You just don’t seem able to get ahead in your studies. You’re just not cut out for it, and for you to remain in high school would, in my opinion, be a waste of time.” The boy buried his face in his hands. “This will be hard on my mother and father,” he said. “Their one idea is for me to be a college man.”

The psychologist laid his hand on the boy’s shoulder and said, “People have different kinds of talents, Johnnie. But every one of us has something special——and you are no exception. Some day you will find what your special gift is and when you do, you will make your parents very proud of you.”

Johnnie never went back to school. Jobs were scarce in town, but he managed to keep busy mowing the lawns of the householders and puttering in their flower-beds. And then a curious thing happened. Before long his customers began to notice that Johnnie had what they called a “green thumb.” The plants he tended grew and blossomed, and the rose trees blossomed. He fell into the habit of making suggestions for rearranging the tiny front-yard landscapes. He had an eye for color and could make surprising combinations that pleased the eye.

One day while he was downtown, he happened to notice a stretch of unused land behind the city hall. Chance or fate or whatever you may like to call it brought one of the town’s alderman round the corner just at that moment. Impetuously the boy said, “I can make a garden out of this dump, if you’ll let me.”

“The town’s got no money for frills,” said the alderman. “I don’t want any money for it,” said the boy, “I just want to do it.” The alderman was astounded to find someone who did not want money. He took Johnnie into an office, and when the young man came out he had the authority to clean up the public eyesore. Before long the dreary old dump had become a little park. All the towns people were talking about what a lovely improvement the young man had made.

That was twenty five years ago. Today Johnnie is the head of a prosperous business in landscape gardening. His customers extend into neighboring provinces. His aging parents are proud of Johnnie, for he is not only a success, but he has also made his part of the world a lovelier place to live in.

How to Make Sticky New Year Resolutions?

Atul Mathur © 2004. All Rights Reserved.
Web site: http://atulmathur.com

The idea of New Year resolutions conjures up different feelings among different people. Some doubt the significance of resolutions in real life, while others doubt their ability to stick to their own resolutions.

Some feel disappointed over their past failures with resolutions, while others feel tempted to make new, bolder ones.

So why should one make New Year resolutions in the first place? Is there a way to turn resolutions from wishful thinking into reality?

Considering the notoriously low success rate of resolutions made on New Year’s Eve, many people would like to leave this custom to others. Why fail again? What is the point?

You must, however, be aware that the ritual of making resolutions offers a three-in-one opportunity.

First, there is no other time of the year when the whole atmosphere is so conducive to relax, reflect and look forward. The window of opportunity is small, however.

It is like half-time in a basketball game. The first half is gone, with the second due to start soon. Now is the time to breathe, think and plan how you can do better in the rest of the game. Would you want to miss it?

The second aspect of this opportunity is about desires. Making resolutions enables you to connect with your deepest desires. When a smoker thinks to himself: “I should quit smoking”, it reflects his deepest desire. If not for the ritual of resolutions, you would continue to smoke, drink and gain weight without a yearly reminder that, deep inside, you don’t want it all. Wouldn’t you like to fulfil your deepest desires?

The third aspect is about the thrill of challenging yourself. Who would dispute that making resolutions is like taking a test with little confidence of passing it?

It is easy to live an unchallenged, safe life; it is difficult to be challenged and face the failure. Want the thrill of challenge? Make resolutions for the New Year.

Here are seven keys to make your new year resolutions sticky:

1. Do it alone

Resolutions made hurriedly in a sudden rush of inspiration are bound to disappear sooner than you can imagine. Making resolutions should not be an event, it should be a process. Make an appointment with yourself to sit alone in a quiet place. Reflect on the past and dream about the future. What would you like to be different in the coming year? Why?

2. Clarity

Desire is not resolution. Resolution means specific action steps to fulfil a desire. Recognise your deepest desires and ask: “What action can I take?” Clarity is important. One sure way to achieve clarity is to write down the resolutions.

3. Quality not quantity

The best way to improve the chances of success is to make a few but profound resolutions. Go for quality, not quantity.

4. Chew over your resolutions

Once you have zeroed in on a few resolutions, think about the difficulties and challenges ahead. Imagine yourself doing what you wish to do and enjoying success. Imagine overcoming the temptations to break the resolutions. The more your chew over them, the better will be the chances of success.

5. Reminder

Help yourself by writing your resolutions in an e-mail and scheduling it to come to you, for instance, every Monday morning.

6. Dedicate

Dedicate each of your resolutions to someone you love. For example, if you wish to quit smoking, dedicate this resolution to someone you really care about – your children, mother or spouse, for instance. Let your love for them strengthen your resolve.

7. Try until you fail to fail

Despite all the keys, if you fail, do not forget the ultimate key: Keep trying until you fail to fail! Got it? Never give up!

Happy New Year!

A Time to Awake

Nov 22nd, 2008

What has become of your [fondest] dreams? If you were guaranteed success,
what would you dare to attempt? We all have dreams, deep inside. Those moments
when we take a voyage in our imagination, into a world where every thing was
possible, a world where fear is a strange concept, limits are non-existent and
we are at peace with ourselves.

How come our dreams remain just those dreams? Why are we stuck in job we hate,
held bound by the fear of the unknown, if we dare to stand up and walk away?

Every new day seems to take us farther away from our dreams. Sometimes we get so
caught up [in the rat race]. Our dreams seems like a distant memory. Little by
little, we let our dreams die.

How come our biggest dreams don’t come true?

The answer is not a profound revelation from the east, culled from wisdom of the
ancients. It is so simple, you begin to wonder why it skipped you all these years.

Our dreams simply don’t come true because we keep on sleeping after dreaming.
We don’t wake up, get out of bed and do something about it. The best dreams
come to pass when you are awake?

Sometimes we actually wake up and take one grant leap for mankind, then we [plummet]
back to earth, lick our wounds, convince ourselves that it is not feasible
and promptly go back to sleep. Sometimes we give it a second or third shot
before we say goodbye and return to [status quo avenue]. Well, we gave our best
shot?

The only way our dreams can come true is when we start doing something
about it. Start with the baby step, one tiny step after another. With time,
you will be amazed by how far you had gone.

The more steps you take in the direction of your dreams, the bolder you become.
Soon you start seeing [shafts] of light at the end of tunnel. The closer you get,
the more feasible it becomes. Gradually your fear begins to [ebb] away. Taking the
first step is a scary business. You can determine the [magnitude] and direction
of that first step. Some folks grab the [bull] by the horn, quit their day jobs,
and go for it. Others keep their day jobs, and moonlight at sun down, till they
get to the point they can comfortably fire their boss. For others still, it means
a change of career.

Whichever route you take to the land of your dreams, the starting point is waking
up and doing something. Then keep on and keeping on. It is only a matter of time,
you will get there.

http://www.en8848.com.cn/Article/Others/Inspirational/7597.html

Status quo is a Latin term meaning the current, or existing state of affairs.
To maintain the status quo is to keep the things the way they presently are.
The related phrase status quo ante means “the state of affairs that existed previously.”

A rat race is a term used for an endless, self-defeating or pointless pursuit.
It conjures up the image of the futile efforts of a lab rat trying to escape whilst
running around a maze or in a wheel. In an analogy to the modern city, many rats in
a single maze run around making a lot of noise bumping into each other, but ultimately
achieve nothing (meaningful) either collectively or individually.

The rat race is a term often used to describe work, particularly excessive work;
in general terms, if one works too much, one is in the rat race. This terminology
contains implications that many people see work as a seemingly endless pursuit
with little reward or purpose. Not all workers feel like this.

学好英语口语的公式：口语=说=模仿+复述

如何让自己的口语达到不假思索地脱口而出,有两大步骤不能忽视：一是要学会模仿，二就是要学会复述，总归还是一个字“说”，概括的公式为“口语=说=模仿+复述”，希望对你的口语提高有所帮助。

衡量口语水平四大要点

1.语音、语调是否正确，口齿是否清楚；
2.流利程度；
3.语法是否正确，用词是否恰当，是否符合英语表达习惯；
4.内容是否充实，逻辑是否清楚。

这些是衡量会话能力的主要标准。针对以上标准，我们可以采取相应的训练方法：

模仿的原则

一、大声模仿，模仿时要大大方方，清清楚楚，一板一眼，口形要到位，不能扭扭捏捏，小声小气地在嗓眼里嘟嚷。

二、随时都准备纠正自己说不好的单词或短语等，有了这种意识，在模仿时就不会觉得单调枯燥，才能主动的有意识有目的地去模仿，这种模仿才是真正的模仿，才能达到模仿的目的，也就是要用心揣摩的体会。

三、坚持长期模仿。一般来说，纯正优美的语音语调不是短期模仿所能达到的，需要一段时间，时间的长短取于自学者的专心程度。
模仿的标准

模仿要达到什么程度才算好了呢？简单地说就是要“像”，如果能够达到“是”就更好了，但不一定要达到“是”。“像”是指模仿者的语音语调等都很接近所模仿的语言，“是”就是不仅在语音语调等方面都很接近所模仿的声音，而且非常逼真。

模仿的方法

第 一步，模仿语音。模仿时要一板一眼，口形要正确，刚开始模仿时，速度不要过快，用慢速模仿，以便把音发到位，待把音发准了以后，再加快速度，用正常语速反 复多说几遍，直到达到不用想就能用正常语速把句子轻松地说出来(脱口而出)，对于自己读不准或较生疏的单词要反复多听几遍，然后再反复模仿，一个单词一个 单词地练，在那些常用词上下功夫，尽量模仿得像一些。

第二步，模仿词组的读法。有了第一步的基础，这一步就容易多了。重点要放在熟练程度和流利程度上，要多练一下连读、同化等语音技巧。

第三步，段落及篇章模仿，重点在于提高流利程度。打开录音机或收音机跟着模仿，“他”说你模仿，同步进行。目的要提高口腔肌肉的反应速度，使肌肉和大脑更加协调起来。

模 仿练习时要注意一个问题，就是害羞心理。害羞心理一方面源于性格，一般性格内向的人，讲话时易小声小气，这对学习英语语音语调很不利，要注意克服。另一方 面是源于自卑心理，总以为自己英语水平太差，不敢开口，尤其是当与口语水平比自己高的人对话时，更易出现这种情况。克服这种心理障碍，是学好口语的前提。
复述的方法

学英语离不开记忆，记忆不是死记硬背，要有灵活性。复述就是一种很好的自我训练口语，记忆单词、的句子的形式。
复述有两种常见的方法。一是阅读后复述，一是听磁带或CD后复述。后种方法更好些，这种方法既练听力，又练口语表达能力。同时，可以提高注意力的集中程度，提高听的效果，而且还可以提高记忆力，克服听完就忘的毛病。
复述的原则

要 循序渐进，可由一两句开始，听完后用自己的话(英语)把所听到的内容说出来，一遍复述不下来，可多听几遍，越练遗忘就越少。在刚开始练习时，因语言表达能 力、技巧等方面原因，往往复述接近于背诵，但在基础逐渐打起来后，就会慢慢放开，由“死”到“活”。在保证语言正确的前提下，复述可有越来越大的灵活性， 如改变句子结构，删去一些不大有用或过难的东西，长段可以缩短，甚至仅复述大意或作内容概要。

复述的内容也要有所选择。一般来说，所选资料的内容要具体生动，有明确的情节，生词量不要太大。可选那些知识性强的小短文。开始时可以练习复述小故事，有了基础后，复述的题材可扩展开些。

复述表面看慢，实际上对英语综合能力的培养很有帮助。如果时间较充足，可以在口头复述的基础上，再用笔头复述一下，这样做可以加深掌握语言的精确程度，提高书面表达能力。

How to Learn a Foreign Language: 5 Keys to Success

Note: These guidelines should be rigorously followed, even if you are taking a language course.
Learn a Foreign Language

1) Spend the time!

By far the most important factor is how much time you are immersed in the language. The more time you spend with the language, the faster you will learn. This means listening, reading, writing, speaking, and studying words and phrases. This does not mean sitting in class looking out the window, nor listening to other students who do not speak well, nor getting explanations in your own language about how the language works. This means spending time enjoyably connected to the language you are learning.

2) Listen and read every day!

Listen wherever you are on your MP3 player. Read what you are listening to. Listen to and read things that you like, things that you can mostly understand, or even partly understand. If you keep listening and reading you will get used to the language. One hour of listening or reading is more effective than many hours of class time.

3) Focus on words and phrases!

Build up your vocabulary, you’ll need lots. Start to notice words and how they come together as phrases. Learn these words and phrases through your listening and reading. Read online, using online dictionaries, and make your own vocabulary lists for review. Soon you will run into your new words and phrases elsewhere. Gradually you will be able to use them. Do not worry about how accurately you speak until you have accumulated a plenty of words through listening and reading.

4) Take responsibility for your own learning!

If you do not want to learn the language, you won’t. If you do want to learn the language, take control. Choose content of interest, that you want to listen to and read. Seek out the words and phrases that you need to understand your listening and reading. Do not wait for someone else to show you the language, nor to tell you what to do. Discover the language by yourself, like a child growing up. Talk when you feel like it. Write when you feel like it. A teacher cannot teach you to become fluent, but you can learn to become fluent if you want to.

5) Relax and enjoy yourself!

Do not worry about what you cannot remember, or cannot yet understand, or cannot yet say. It does not matter. You are learning and improving. The language will gradually become clearer in your brain, but this will happen on a schedule that you cannot control. So sit back and enjoy. Just make sure you spend enough time with the language. That is the greatest guarantee of success.

11 Life-Saving Health Habits

We’re constantly being bombarded with different dos and don’ts for living longer and preventing cancer, heart disease and other ailments—which can make it seem like being healthy takes a lot of hard work. But the truth is, a few simple habits can have a big impact. These 11 made our must-do list because they’ve got the most bang for the buck or because they’re so super-easy—and so lifesaving—that we couldn’t not include them. Work them into your daily schedule and boost your odds of living a healthy, long life.
* Eat a Colorful Salad and Two Pieces of Fruit

Fruits and vegetables have key nutrients and antioxidants that can help prevent a slew of diseases and slow down the aging process. Eat more than five servings of fruit a day and you may lower your risk of heart disease by 60 percent; have three servings of veggies a day and you could slash your risk by 70 percent. Meanwhile, recent research from the National Cancer Institute found that people who ate the most produce had a 35 percent lower risk of head and neck cancer. Fruits and veggies that are particularly high in disease-fighting antioxidants include plums, blueberries, strawberries, spinach and red bell peppers.
* Take a 30-Minute Walk

Exercise can lower your risk for just about everything, from heart disease and diabetes to osteoporosis, depression and many forms of cancer. In fact, new research from the National Cancer Institute found that people who exercise moderately for 30 minutes most days of the week have a 27 percent decreased risk of dying prematurely. “Every time you exercise, you decrease the production of free radicals in your body,” explains Katherine Sherif, MD, director of the Center for Women’s Health at Drexel University in Philadelphia.“ Many diseases are the end result of the accumulation of excess free radicals, which can cause your cells to become dysfunctional.” Make sure you get at least 30 minutes of activity each day. It’s not as hard as you think: Take a walk during lunchtime, park your car farther back in the lot and take the stairs instead of the elevator whenever possible.
* Have Oatmeal for Breakfast

A diet rich in whole grains can help lower your risk of developing heart disease, type 2 diabetes, hypertension and stroke. (Other good sources include whole- or multi-grain bread, high-fiber cereals, air-popped popcorn and brown rice.) What’s more, people in a recent study at the University of California, San Francisco, who ate two or more servings of whole-grain foods per day had a 40 percent lower risk of pancreatic cancer. And research from the University of Sydney concluded that one of the best diets to delay the onset of age-related diseases like osteoporosis, heart disease and dementia is one that’s high in whole-grain cereals, legumes, fruits and vegetables, and low in calories and saturated fat. The big bonus: Eating breakfast can help you lose weight and keep it off. Experts think that people who have this a.m. meal tend to eat fewer calories over the course of the day.
* Keep Tabs on Portion Sizes

That’s one of the best ways to stay at a healthy weight (or lose some excess pounds if you have to)—and being overweight or obese has been linked to just about every disease in the book, including heart disease, type 2 diabetes, hypertension and numerous forms of cancer.

A handy reference guide: 3 oz of meat looks like a deck of cards; 3 oz of fish resembles a checkbook; a cup of pasta is the size of a tennis ball; a bagel should be about the size of a hockey puck; 1 oz of cheese equals two dice; 2 Tbsp of butter or peanut butter is the size of a ping-pong ball.
* Wear Your Seat Belt

This one’s a no-brainer: Every hour someone in America dies because he or she isn’t wearing a safety belt, according to the American College of Emergency Physicians. Strapping yourself in is simply the most effective way to reduce your risk of injury or death in a crash (about 55 percent of passengers killed in traffic crashes in 2006 weren’t wearing a belt).

While you’re at it, put down the cell phone. Studies have shown that driver distraction is a leading cause of car crashes—and that wearing a headset won’t necessarily help.
* Eat Fish

It’s the best source of omega-3 fatty acids, which research shows can help reduce your risk of a wide variety of conditions. “They help combat inflammation in the body, which is implicated in numerous conditions including heart disease, diabetes and various cancers,” says David Katz, MD, director of the Yale-Griffin Prevention Research Center. If you’re not a fish lover, try an omega-3 supplement (Dr. Katz recommends that all his patients take one) and/or other foods rich in omega-3s including walnuts, flaxseed and canola oil.
* Call a Close Friend

A growing body of research suggests that loneliness or social isolation can negatively affect your hormones, heart and immune system. What’s more, a recent study at the University of California, San Diego, revealed that women who feel isolated experience strokes at more than twice the rate of those who are social. “It’s not a matter of having a ton of friends but having meaningful, nurturing relationships,” Dr. Katz says. Even a quick chat can go a long way toward helping you feel connected.
* Relax for 10 Minutes (At Least)

You don’t need studies to tell you that chronic stress takes a toll mentally and physically. “It affects your entire body, from hormonal balance to how your immune, nervous and cardiovascular systems function,” says Dr. Katz. Fortunately, you can take the edge off the harmful effects. Yoga, for example, has been shown to improve glucose tolerance, insulin sensitivity, lipid levels, blood pressure and lung function in people with type 2 diabetes. And new research presented at the American College of Cardiology’s annual meeting found that lowering stress levels dramatically reduces the risk of a heart attack and death in people with heart disease. So think about the things that calm you down—gardening, listening to music, getting a manicure, reading—and do one of them every day. Not only will it help you decompress, it’ll help you regroup and handle the next round of stress even better.
* Sleep!

People who don’t get enough are at greater risk for diabetes, obesity, high cholesterol, mood problems and other disorders, says Julie Roth, MD, medical director for the Wellness Institute, Northwestern Memorial Physicians Group . So how much is enough? Research has found that five or fewer hours a night does the most damage, but the key is to figure out how much you need and get that as regularly as you can. On your next vacation, wake up without an alarm for three nights in a row. On the first two nights you may oversleep because you’re catching up, but by the third night you should naturally wake up after the right amount. Quality matters, too: Poor sleep is linked with an increased risk of heart disease, type 2 diabetes and hypertension, especially in women. Make your bedroom purely for sleep—no laptops, PDAs or other stressful items. This way your body and mind associate the room only with sleep. If you’re tossing and turning night after night, talk to your doctor.
* Stay Smoke-Free

Smoking is one of the leading causes of preventable death, says Dr. Roth, since it impacts every organ in your body. According to the American Cancer Society, smoking accounts for about 30 percent of all cancer deaths—and we’re not just talking about lung cancer. It’s been linked to at least 15 different cancers, including mouth, throat, bladder, cervical, pancreatic, kidney and stomach cancers. It also ups your risk of heart disease and osteoporosis. But kicking the habit reverses the effects relatively quickly. One year after you quit smoking, your risk of heart disease drops to half of that of a current smoker; 10 years after quitting, your risk of dying of lung cancer is half that of a current smoker; and within 15 years, your risk of having a heart attack or stroke is on par with that of someone who has never smoked.
* Have a Glass of Red Wine

Red wine has been linked to lower blood pressure, higher HDL (“good”) cholesterol, and a reduced risk of osteoporosis and dementia—most likely thanks to a substance called resveratrol and powerful antioxidants (flavonoids). The key is not to overdo it.

Women who have more than one drink a day (that’s one 4-oz glass) have an increased risk of high blood pressure, stroke, breast cancer, obesity and alcoholism. Experts from the American Heart Association also caution that you shouldn’t start drinking alcohol if you don’t already. (If you’re not a drinker, you can probably reap similar benefits from purple grape juice.)

In 21 days a change becomes habit. Try one of these every three weeks.

http://www.debuluo.com/space-63004-do-thread-id-747.html

阅读长知识：马克吐温说

Mark Twain这家伙以幽默著称，向来说话没个正经。这里葛竞选了他难得的几句严肃的话，以飨读者。

1. The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one.

要领先的秘诀就是要先开始。开始做事的秘诀就是要先把复杂的排山倒海的事分做能做到的一件件小事，然后着手去做第一件。

2. There are two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded.

世界上有两类人，第一类人作出了成就；第二类人号称自己作出了成就。第一类人不如第二类人那么多。

3. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

二十年后，让你觉得失望不是你做过的事情，而是你没有做过的事情。那么，就解开帆索吧，从安全的港湾里面开出来吧，跟着帆上的信风，去探索吧，去梦想吧，去发现吧。

4. I was seldom able to see an opportunity unitil it had ceased to be one.

我总是等机会错过了才能发现我曾有过机会。

5. Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.

如果我们能在80岁的时候出生，然后慢慢往18岁的时候过，那人生简直就幸福无限了。

6. Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living; the world owes you nothing; it was here first.

别到处说世界亏欠了你，世界什么都不亏欠你的，你还没出生他就在那儿了！

Jonathan Swift的八条智慧箴言 愿你享受你的生活

“May you live all the days of your life.”

愿你享受你的生活！！！

“There were many times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails.”

很多次因为我那精深的裤子所以我可以坐在一个极狭小的地方诉说这些所谓的事情。

Jonathan Swift was an Anglo-Irish writer that lived a couple of centuries ago (1667-1745).

乔纳森·斯威夫特(1667-1745)是生活在几个世纪以前的英爱作家。

He is perhaps most known for classics like Gulliver’s Travels and A Modest Propsal. The latter being the ironic and shocking essay where he suggested that impoverished Irish people should sell their babies as food to rich people. Such works has earned Swift a reputation as one of the finest satirists of all time.

他可能因为他经典著作《格列佛游记》和《一个小小的建议》闻名于世。其中《一个小小的建议》是一部极具讽刺意义的小说，书中他“建议”贫困的爱尔兰人可以将他们的孩子卖给富人以此来获得食物的保障。类似的著作为斯威夫特赢得了历史上最厉害的讽刺作家的荣誉。

Since Swift was a writer there is a ton of things to quote. He is 8 of my favourite pearls of wisdom at the moment.

作为一个作家，斯威夫特有很多的东西可以为我们所引用，这里是我最喜欢的他的八条智慧箴言。

1. Don’t fear being wrong.
不要害怕犯错

“A man should never be ashamed to own that he has been in the wrong, which is but saying… that he is wiser today than yesterday.”

一个人不应该为他现在的错误而感到尴尬和不安，因为这只能说他他今天比昨天更加聪慧。

This is a great point. So much of what we learn in society is about how you should not fail and not make mistakes. In school we are taught to get good grades and play by the rules. And so always taking a safe route and not taking risks can become an ingrained behaviour as we learn to associate failure with shame and pain.

这是一条伟大的言论。我们在社会中学习最多的是我们如何避免失败和错误。在学校里我们努力获得好的成绩并谨守纪律。所以我们一直在寻找所谓安全的成长路线，避免冒险，我们认为这样我们就可以养成极好的行为习惯，其实这只不过是因为我们总是认为失败就是耻辱和悲痛。

But one should really not be afraid of making mistakes. Or admitting that he or she has been wrong. By recognizing that you can release the negative emotions that may dwell within and move on to the next thing. Admitting that you have been wrong also makes it easier to clearly analyse what you did and what you can learn from the experience.

但是一个人不应该害怕犯错误也不应该害怕承认他（她）曾经犯过错误。认识到这一点你就可以抛掉你可能久久不能释怀的消极心情影响更好的走向下一步。承认你所犯的错误也可以使你跟容易和清晰的分析你以前所做的事情并从中吸收经验。

2. Money is useful. Love of it is hazardous.
金钱是有用的，但是过分追求是危险的

“A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart.”

聪明的人放在脑子里而不是心里。

Money is very useful. But if you let it take the wrong place in your life it can wreck havoc.

毋庸置疑，金钱是非常有用的，但是如果在生活中如果你放错了位置，那么将会是毁灭性的。

It can create greed and much negativity in your life. And if you love the money, you’ll probably just want more and more. No matter how much you get. And it may not fill you up and finally make you happy as you may have hoped.

它会使你变的贪婪并并引起你生活消极的方面。如果你沉溺于金钱，那么你就想拥有更多的金钱，无论你已经有了多少。而它永远不会满足也不会使你像你想象的那么开心。

The drive to always wanting more can become like filling a bucket with a hole in it. And as you slowly realize that this won’t work as you had hoped bitterness and negativity can start to fester in your life.

这种驱使就像往有洞的水桶里加水。你希望得到的永远不会得到这样慢慢的痛苦和消极就会开始在你的生活中滋生和蔓延。

Now, it’s important to not let this reasoning lead you to believe that money is evil. Money is a tool. It can help you to achieve many positive things.

当然，这样说并不是要你以为金钱是邪恶的，金钱仅仅是一个工具，他会帮助你得到很多你想到的东西。

It’s just that a love of money can be destructive.

但是过分沉溺就会是毁灭性的。

3. Dig where you stand.
深掘你所立之地

“Although men are accused of not knowing their own weakness, yet perhaps few know their own strength. It is in men as in soils, where sometimes there is a vein of gold which the owner knows not of.”

虽然人们总是抱怨不知道自己的弱点，但是也可能很少人清楚他们的优势。对于人就像对于我们脚下的土地，也许它下面有大堆的金子但是土地的主人却不知道。

I think this is true. It’s very easy to fall into an addictive pattern of criticizing yourself and others. But what are the positive things in you and the people around you?

这是真实存在的。人们很容易谴责自己和他人。但是你是否注意了自己和你周围的人的优点。

If you just look for things to criticize then that is what you will see. If you look for things to criticize in yourself that is what you will see in yourself and pay attention to in others.

如果你只是在你所看到的事物中虚造谴责的对象。如果你只是总寻找自己的弱点并自责，过分注意其他人。

So what can you do? You can start digging where you are standing. Instead of asking yourself those negative questions continually, ask yourself: what is good about me? Ask yourself where you strengths and talents lie. And don’t give up at once just because a negative mindset may initially not let you see what’s good and positive about you.

所以你该怎么做那？你应该深掘你脚下的土地了。不要再不停的问自己那些消极的问题，尝试这样问自己：我有那些优点？问问自己在那些地方没有尽力。不要出现一个消极的念头时候马上变的消沉你应该好好看看这些是否有对自己有利的一面。

What you focus on most of the time is what you will see of reality. Knowing your weaknesses and learning from mistakes is helpful. But to dwell on criticism and the negative parts will just keep you in a loop where you create more of that for yourself.

你这样想的多了你就会看到事情的本质。知道你自己的缺点并且从中学习将会是非常有益的。但是如果总想着消极的一面会使你陷入无法自拔的恶性循环。

At some point it’s useful to move on from that and start to shift your focus to the positive. And see what gold that will help you uncover.

从这些消极的方面转移你的思想到积极的一面，你就会发现你说未发觉的黄金所在。

4. Go further than you may think you can.
比你想象的走的更远

“I’ve always believed no matter how many shots I miss, I’m going to make the next one.”

我始终相信不管我射偏了多少次，我还是会把握下一次。

One big problem with success is that you may want it right now. Or at least very soon. No wonder, advertising continually bombards us with messages of how we can become thin or rich in just 30 days. And when that promise doesn’t work we go out to buy a new product that “will surely be the magic pill that will solve the problem quickly”. And so on.

我们对成功总是迫不及待。广告里总是不断轰炸般的宣传我们可以在30天里瘦下来或者成为富翁。但这个承诺没有成功我们就会马上购买另一种“可以迅速解决问题的神奇药丸”的产品，等等。

Now, I’m not saying that a lot of the stuff out there doesn’t work. It probably does. I’m just saying that it may take more time, patience and work than advertised to get you where you want to go.

这里我并不是说所有的东西都没有效果，虽然大部分情况下是这样的。我想说的是这些都比广告中宣传的需要更多的时间，耐心才能发挥效果。

It’s useful to take a break from advertised perspectives and let more realistic perspectives seep into your mind. Learn from people who have gone where you want to go. Talk to them. Read what they have to say in books or online. This will not give complete plan but a clearer perspective of what is needed to achieve what you want.

从相信广告宣传中暂时停下来，学会更多更加实际的东西。从有类似经验的人那里学习，和他们多交流。从书籍中或网络中了解他们的说法。这些可能并不会给你一个完整的计划但是可以为你达到自己的目标提供一个清晰的蓝图。

And then you plug away. You don’t let setbacks or failure discourage you. You go out and try again. And just when you feel like giving up you go on a little further. And a little further.

然后尽可能努力的学习或实践。你不想让失败和挫折使你失去信心。你不停的尝试。当你想要放弃的时候记得再往前走一点点，仅仅一点点。

Because it’s often darkest before the dawn.

因为黎明前往往是黑暗。

5. Be good to yourself.
善待自己

“The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman.”

这世界上最好的医生是合理饮食，适当安静，快快乐乐。

It’s nowadays common to run yourself into the ground and then, as you feel like a shadow of your former self, to seek help.

你跌倒了，在你内心总是存在以前的阴影，去寻找帮助吧。

But a big part of keeping your health – mentally and physically – in good shape is to prevent problems before they even show up and force you to go to the doctor.

保持健康的一个诀窍（不论精神上的或身体上的）就是在病出现你不得不去看医生之前有效防止它们的发生。

Swift brings some common sense into this challenge. By doing simple things consistently, by making them ingrained habits one can avoid many problems down the line.

斯威夫特在这点上和我们存在共识。坚持做这些简单的事情，并养成良好的习惯可以防止这些问题到最后严重的发生。

· Doctor Diet. Eat not too little or too much. Eat slowly to really enjoy the taste and avoid overeating, an upset stomach and added stress.

· 合理饮食。不要吃太多或太少。慢慢吃好像自己在享受美食的味道避免暴饮暴食，这样你就会胃很不舒服并且增加你内心的压力。

· Doctor Quiet. Always being around noise and other people can drain you. It’s important to find some quiet time for yourself regularly to avoid being overloaded. Being out in nature is one good way to reconnect with the quiet and stillness and is often forgotten in the busy daily life.

· 适当安静。如果经常处在一个喧闹的环境中你就会没有自己的空间。为自己有规律的安排点时间避免过载负荷。到野外走走是回归宁静的一个好办法，它会暂时忘却繁忙的日常生活。

· Doctor Merryman. How happy and positive one wants to feel is often to a large degree a choice. You can cultivate a negative attitude towards everything. Or a positive one. A few tips for creating a positive and optimistic attitude can be found here, here and also here.

· 快快乐乐。快乐和积极的态度往往很大程度上在于自己的选择。你可以自己选择自己是消极还是积极。保持积极的秘诀是随时挖掘自己的快乐，快乐不再他处，就在这里。

Now, this may sound like almost stupidly simple advice. And the information is very simple. Many very helpful things are very simple.

这看起来是不是有点太简单了。其实很多有用的东西都很简单。

More advanced tips may sound intriguing because one may associate complicated with better. But everything has to have foundations. Without those everything you build on top of them will only work at a limited capacity or sometimes just crumble.

许多锦言看起来很模糊，那是因为人们总是以为好的就是复杂的。但是任何东西都有一定的基础做铺垫。没有这些基础你说笃信的只可能在一定范围内发挥效用有时甚至是支离破碎的。

6. Put down the extra, unnecessary baggage you are carrying.
甩掉那多余的，不必要的负担

“The latter part of a wise person’s life is occupied with curing the follies, prejudices and false opinions they contracted earlier.”

聪明人知道如何改变自己以前形成的愚笨，偏见和虚伪。

We pick a whole lot when we are young. Some of it is helpful. A lot of it will hold you back and create a lot of unnecessary suffering in your life.

年轻时候我们学会了很多东西，一些是有用的。但是有些是不好的会在生活中给你带来很多不必要的苦恼。

You may have learned things from society – or sometimes gotten stuff drilled into your head – when you were young. You may have taken what someone said or did to you once or repeatedly as an absolute truth about you and your life.

年轻时候你会从社会中学到很多东西，这些东西深刻于你的头脑里。你会相信有些人的说法和言行并把他当作你生活中的真理重复着做。

But as a grown up, as you start to examine your life and beliefs you may discover that those things was just things that happened. They are in the past. You are here now.

但是随着你的长大，你开始发现这些东西都过时了，他们只使用于过去，而你生活在现在。

And by grasping that it’s you who are always in control of your life – that you are creating it right now – you understand that unhelpful beliefs or what happened doesn’t have to mean that much really.

了解到真是你自己才真正控制这你自己的生活，你终于理解那些所谓的信念并不是那么有用或不可颠破。

You can choose to drop them and continue with a lightness in your step down a road that you are creating for yourself now.

你可以选择适当的放弃他们然后用适合你自己的步伐照亮自己的未来。

7. Learn to create a connection.

“Good manners is the art of making those people easy with who we converse. Whoever makes the fewest people uneasy is the best bred in the room.”

好的礼貌是可以使我们交谈的人更加容易接触的艺术。谁让更少的人感觉自然谁就是房间里的明星。

A big chunk of social skills seems to be making other people feeling comfortable and good about themselves. To create and exchange a stream of positive emotions.

一个很重要的社交技巧就是如何交流过程中如何让别人感觉舒服和自我良好。这时你需要创造和交流形成一个积极的情感氛围。

How do you go about doing that in a practical way? A few suggestions:

在实际交往中你准备怎么做那？几个建议：

· Like yourself. I think this is very important because a person who likes him/herself is someone people find appealing. This is however not something that may be that easy for everyone. People may see themselves as ugly, stupid, poor or something along those negative lines.
A few tips that you can apply – over a longer time-period – is to stop comparing yourself to other people, taking tip # 3 in this article to heart and start looking at the positive in yourself and following the tip above and start weeding out old beliefs about life and yourself that doesn’t help you anymore. You can also check out 9 Great Ways to Make Yourself Absolutely Miserable for more stuff to avoid doing to yourself.

· 自信。我认为这是很重要的一点因为一个人自信了才能让别人感觉有吸引力。但是对每个人来说这并不是容易做到的。你可能会觉得自己丑陋，愚蠢，贫穷或者其他消极的方面。

你可以试试以下几点：看一下《不要和别人过多比较》，把文章中的第三条记在心里并且照着上面说说的建议开始摒弃那些关于自己和生活对你无益的信念。你也可以尝试阅读《9个让你痛不欲生的做法》了解更多而避免犯类似的错误。

· Be interested in the other person. This one is connected to the previous point about liking yourself. Because when you like yourself you don’t need other people to validate you all the time as you hog the spotlight. You may choose to stand in the spotlight, but there is less of a craving for it. And now it becomes easier to shift your focus from “me, me, me!” to the person you are talking to. It becomes easier to be genuinely interested and create a connection. Have a look at Five Awesome and Five Awful Conversation Topics for more on this.

· 对别人表现出兴趣。这点和上一点相信你自己是有关联的。因为你自信了你就不需要感觉在别人眼里你是否是焦点。你会自己选择站在聚光灯下，但是你会感觉这根 本没有必要。现在就需要把焦点从自己身上转换到你要交流的人身上，这样就会很简单的让别人产生兴趣获得交流。你可以尝试阅读《五点很棒的和五点很糟糕的谈 话要点》了解更多。

· Be warm, open and positive. Well, people tend to like warm, open and positive people. And most people reflect back the behaviour they encounter. So creating such habits for yourself can go a long way in relationships with other people. A quick tip for going into an interaction in the right frame of mind is by assuming rapport.

· 热情，开放和积极。人们倾向于喜欢热情，开放和积极的人，并且人们会把他们这些精神因素反射回来。所以养成这些习惯将会对你以后和人们的交际大有裨益。进入交流你需要注意的一点就是你首先要在你的意思里创造融洽。

8. Be open to the idea that you can always learn.
开放你的思想你就会一直进步

“No man was ever so completely skilled in the conduct of life, as not to receive new information from age and experience.”

在生活中没有人一直能对什么都应付自如，除非他不断从年龄和经历中不断吸取知识。

Being open to this will open up your mind. If you think you know everything, great insights will just pass you by.

保持开放的心态就会开放你的思想，如果你以为你已经无所不知，那么深刻的见解就会错过。

By being open you’ll see, feel and learn things you wouldn’t otherwise. But be careful of focusing too much on learning from books, blogs etc. They have a place and can help you correct things may have done backwards for all of your life.

保持开放的思想你就会不断的感觉和学习知识。但是要注意你放在书本和博客上的精力。它们可以帮助你改正那些可能使你生活倒退的东西。

But the most important thing is to live. And to learn from your experiences. Because it is there you find true understanding of things.

最重要的事情是学会生活，同时从你的经验里学习。因为正是在那里你才能学会生活的真谛。

Are the Differences in Your Relationship Causing Stress?

Are differences with your partner a problem?

Boy and girl:

-grow up in different environments.
-have different life experiences as they mature and grow older.
-finally meet.
-fall in love.
-live together or marry.
-then the trouble starts (sometimes) or live happily ever after (once in a while)

Girl and boy have different opinions about how to do everything and so they either work these out or go back to looking for a different partner whether it takes months or years, is not the issue. The real issue here is the ability and willingness to manage differences, be flexible and compromise.

As you can see from the previous, very brief scenario, it is a miracle that two people ever get along. Differences in opinions, agendas, values and beliefs – you name it – differences abound. Many people feel that if they have some things in common, they both like to dance, like Chinese food and like the same kind of music, that they are destined for a successful relationship. Trust me, these very superficial similarities, no matter how many there are, are not a recipe for lasting relationship bliss.

It is not normal for two people to agree on everything. If they do, they have an extremely boring relationship. People assume that similarities guarantee relationship success. I believe, the ability to manage differences is far more important. Sooner or later differences will surface. In the beginning, one or both parties will hide areas where there is potential conflict due to differences of any kind. This is the time for acceptance, flexibility and compromise. Once the initial comfort period ends, watch as the layers fall away and the REAL people show themselves.

There may be differences about how to raise kids or manage in-laws, how to cook Salmon or clean the house. I really don’t care what they are, sooner or later they will arrive. The question is, can the relationship handle them?

Everyone has personal agendas. Everyone brings them into their relationships. You can’t keep who you are and what you believe out of your relationship. Personal agendas become destructive when there are serious distances or competition between both partners’ agendas. What is an agenda? She wants to quit her career, have babies and stay home. He wants her to keep working so they can save more money for the first few years of their relationship. She wants him to take a job where he can be home every night at 5:30. He wants a career where he can advance and become more successful.

I have heard this phrase hundreds of times: “You are not satisfying my needs.” Everyone has emotional, psychological, physical and spiritual needs. Some of us can contribute to the satisfaction of our partner’s needs, but they must satisfy many of their own needs themselves.

Often times, many people confuse who or what is responsible for the satisfaction of their own needs.

Let’s take a brief look at what most people want in their life. The following are in no particular order:

1. Approval.
2. Acceptance.
3. Validation.
4. To be loved.
5. Appreciation.
6. A dream.
7. To love.
8. Happiness.
9. Success.
10. Fulfillment.
11. To know the purpose of their lives.
12. Inner peace.
13. Life balance.
14. Stress-free life.
15. To accomplish something.
16. Fun.
17. Contentment.
18. Respect.
19. Security.
20. Harmony

Which of these are missing in your life? Which ones are up to you? Which ones do you believe others should give you? Who in your life provides you with some of these? Are you giving your share to your partner?

http://www.success.bz/articles/621/are_the_differences_in_your_relationship_causing_stress